An update

[dreamingpixels]

Well, Johanna actually did read my letter on Facebook, and of course she wasn't happy. She denied she stole anything, denied she threw anything out, lied about how busy she was on my birthday and how she couldn't possibly take five minutes to say happy birthday but she could call to beg me to babysit, and lied about trying to poison Levon! Her entire reply to me (which I deleted out of frustration) looks like she's trying to make me out to be the bad guy. Suuure, because I'm totally the one who stole Mom's codeine, her collectible stuffed animals, and some of her medicine that she needs to survive, and I'm also sooo totally the one who threw out new vacuum bags, a dresser scarf, and all sorts of other stuff Mom was going to use! You would NEVER do something like that, right? Bullshit. Mom told me about how nobody in our family really likes her. About how one time when she was watching my cousin's kid's rabbit, amd got sick of taking care of it, so she snapped the poor thing's neck and said "There, I took care of it." And I remember the time she bought a dog that came with all sorts of supplies, kept it for a week, then took it out back and shot it for no reason.

This'll be the last post I make about her for a while. I can't have a toxic person like her in my life, and I can't think about someone toxic like this either.

I'm going to go drink my coffee, and ponder about working out this morning.

Comments

[ex_fathomless325]

I know you don't want to think about her, but I just wanted to share a link.

http://www.mcafee.cc/Bin/sb.html

That is the profile for a Sociopath. She seems to fit the bill quite handily from what I've read. No one wants someone like that in their life. She needs help. But how on earth do you go about getting it for someone like that?

I can totally understand just shutting her out as much as you can. She's dangerous, totally toxic, and she's not going to change. She can't. She doesn't have the right emotional capacity to even want to. To her there is no such thing as wrong. :/

[dreamingpixels]

Oh my lord, that is her to a tee. Even the promiscuity- before her divorce was final she'd found a number of "boyfriends" - four of them in the month after she filed the papers, and she wanted me to go babysit her boys while she went to North Carolina to chase a fifth. Everything listed just describes her perfectly.

[ex_fathomless325]

I had a feeling it might.

It seems to me like it might be a good idea to maybe find some good information about the disorder and print it out for your mother and other members of your family if you think it would do more good than harm. Help them comes to terms, maybe, with what they're dealing with and perhaps form a foundation for getting her help.

I have no idea how one helps a Sociopath, though, like I said... how can you help someone who has no concept of wrong?

You are the second person I've known who had a sister with this problem, that's why I recognized it so quickly. I don't know what ever happen to the first person, we lost touch. Hm. Maybe I should try and touch base with them somehow... Last I heard she had just shut her sister out completely.

[dreamingpixels]

I might send my mom a link to the webpage - maybe it'll help her cope with things too, and realize it's not her fault Jo's like that.

So far, I think shutting Jo out completely is going to be my plan. That's what Ruthie, my younger sister, has done - she got a sense that something was seriously screwed up with Jo before Mom and I did, and just didn't let her into her life.

[ex_fathomless325]

It's sad that is just what it has to come down to sometimes. :( I feel really sorry for her kids. Can you imagine living with a mother like that? :/

[dreamingpixels]

Oh, I know. One of them is 13 years old and 'homeschooled' (I've been there quite a few times, and I've never really seen any schooling going on), and the other is nearly 9 and is autistic. She's actually had Child Protective Services called on her because she sent the younger kid to school dirty on a number of occasions, and Kyle would say his mom just doesn't give him a bath. He'd also say all sorts of things that raised eyebrows, so the school let CPS know about what was going on. (And when I spent four days at her house for Thanksgiving, neither of the boys took a shower for the entire time I was there) Not only that, but Kyle will only eat junk food, and she doesn't try to get him to eat anything different. One day, he had M&Ms and cookies for dinner, and she didn't have a word to say about it. If I had the money, I'd take the kids and raise them myself...

[ex_fathomless325]

Wow. I think this is one case where the system is definitely failing. CPS obviously know something is up. They need to step in a little harder. I hate to see anyone lose their kids. But kids need more attention than she is able to give them. They deserve better. :(

[dreamingpixels]

Ohh, they do. I'm actually hoping for her abusive ex to get them, because as far as I know he never actually raised a hand to the kids. It's sad, but true. And she'd just leave the kids at home sometimes when she needed to 'run errands'. She'd leave Logan to watch Kyle all on his own, and he's only 13! Even Bryan and I had problems keeping an eye on Kyle, and we're both adults. It took Bryan, Logan, and I to make sure Kyle didn't do anything to hurt himself, and he still managed to grab a kitchen knife and run around with it.

[ex_fathomless325]

Autistic kids are a handful even on their best days. Ugh. This whole thing is starting to make me sick to my stomach. I'm so sorry that you have to deal with this situation so close to home and the heart.

[amethystfirefly]

That's what I was going to say.

Unfortunately, someone has to realize they're fucked up before they'll fix it, and your sister's probably not able to realize that.

[technogoddess]

Yes, toxic. Shut it down. That's all you can do!